new york?

I wrote this on thursday night and i feel it is quite relevant given that i did not actually go to new york. in retrospect it's kind of funny given the complete and utter unfabulousness o fmy weekend which included a car wash, a trip to home depot, and a bowl of ramen. will discuss that later today.

guys i'm taking my first trip EVER to new york in a day. And who better to guide me on my first time than my main homosexxxxxxual, ivan. I think we shall romp and frollick and shop til we drop. Or we could just look at window displays and eat soft serve from mcdonalds. whatevs. So in honor of this trip i've been catching up on my fashion mags and making a list of "things to buy in NY." I was falling asleep in class yesterday and decided that i should draw my ideal outfits and write this list in various colors. It's the little things that make my life livable, really. so here it is!

- puffy vest - shameful but true. i have always wanted a puffy vest and yesterday as it was 50 degrees and not cold enough for a winter coat but not hot enough to not have some kind of wind resistance i thought "today would be an ideal puffy vest day."

- Black flat leather boots that go 3 inches below my knee - finding boots is always really hard because despite having my moments of feeling fat and what not the truth is proportionately i am normal to any person but size wise i am mini so things are not made for peopel of my stature. Boots tend to be too loose on my calves making my legs look like i'm swimming while walking, or they are way too tall. But i really think that in order to explore my new fall look of opaque tights and mini dresses and skirts i really need black flat boots.

- Mini denim skirt - i mean this is not a necessity but a nice dark wash one would be nice. I imagine wearing itwith black tights, black boots, and a white/cream colored turtle neck AND a tartan headband

- mini skirts either tweed, tartan, or knit. I was contemplating even knitting my own skirt in the next few days. I mean basically all you need is a hoop which i have. i shall look at patterns and consdier this option. what color should it be? grey??? Basically i want it like this only way more awesome.

- pleated formal shorts. guys, i know. who am i!! but seriously i have this magical outfit i've been dreaming up in my head of some wool pleated almost poofy cuffed formal mini shorts (shoot me please cathy) that i could wear with black tights and black boots and some kind of top and a flowy scarf and i think it would really kind of be ridiculous enough to be awesome. when i find a pic i will post it

- cream colored or grey knit hat like this
- also i need new urban tennis shoes. maybe i'l ljust bite the big one and finally purchase some all stars. i have so many issues with shoes that i used to pay 20 bucks for in junior high now costing 45 dollars. what the fuck. Well i saw some grey ones that i like and i might just say fuck itand

Dr. Jeffrey Thompson, I love you

So a few of us had dinner tonight and watched the office (heart!) and then beauty and the geek. I tell you, sometimes this show throws me. There were some questions that we didin't know! we are phd students for fuck's sake! example "what are the first 7 words (or some number) of the gettysburg address?" now clearly somehwere in my plethora of knowledge that info is stored up there with how to spell things and do math. But at the moment we all looked at each other and were liek "fuck what IS it!" And then i was liek "wait wait wait, forescore and seven years ago....thank GOD we know it!" And we all breathed a sigh of relief. But i find it a bit sad how our knowledge becomes so specialized and in order to store the new knowledge our brain but finds ways to shrink and push back the old knowledge. There is a cognitive term for this that i also know but can't think of right now so i'll just call it "the more degrees i have, the dumber i get."

So I'm pretty much broke because all of my money has gone toward my orthodontic bills to pay for my TMJ treatments. Now i have a plastic piece in my mouth that acts as a cast making my jaw sit in a different place from where it usually sits so as to relieve my tempo mandibular joint pressure. Yes, very awesome. Basically i have a plastic retainer on my lower teeth and i have to eat with it because eating and sleeping is when the most pressure is placed on the TMJ so blah blah. I look like a geek wiht food stuck in my retainer and it's kind of disgusting and i brush my teeth like 6 times a day. to top it off it also exacerbates my lisp. it's ok though, cuz i'm on hiatus.

Oh in other news i have to make a confession. so i don't sleep very well. Part of me thinks it might be my stress but i guess it might also be this whole teeth clenching thing. but anyways i decided to say fuck it and just go buy one of those "serenity now" sleeping cd's. I went to the new age section at borders and there were so many options! i was like....hmm should i get ocean sounds or should i get "pure moods" the 5 cd box set. In the end i opted for some cd called "peaceful: music for sleep." but being a consumer whore, this is why i bought it. check out what the cover says.

Dr. Jeffrey Thompson's clinically proven musical system helps you fall sleep, stay asleep, and wake up feeling rested and refreshed. Meditative melodies, flutes, piano, guitar, and strings, embedded with Delta Wave Pulses irresistibly lull you to sleep

tell me you would not have bought that!! hello it sounds awesome. i dont' know what the fuck delta wave pulses are but i can imagine that they are useful and shit. so anyways i've been using it for the past week and i find it all very embarassing and this will definitely go into my folder of "shameful single behavior" that i will surely hide from my future significant other. But seriously i kind of love it!! Dr. Jeffrey Thompson has other ones too liek "ambient: music for sleep" and "serenity: music for sleep." I'm thinking i need to mix it up and maybe get a few of these cd's and just rotate them. If anyone would like a copy of my cd it's a 1 hour clip. i will send you that shit because i am a good person like that.

So i leave you with some poetry

But my heart, is a house
Will you come, and move in
Leave a space, for us to give
....
It's the sound, that I want
It's the low, belting cough
It's the size, of my heart,
It's the house, can we start.

No i didin't write it because i don't write poetry. but i like the song and the words are very, how you say....i don't know. I just like them.

How i am apparently a racist against my own people

So i was watching the Hills today (last night's episode) and there was this brilliant editting moment. Let me describe. So they justapose this scene of LC at Brody Jenner's birthday in Vegas chilling at the pool and drinking and being fabulous at Pure along with Heide and Spencer in LA eating at Don Antonio's. The reason this scene cracked me up was because sometimes i feel like i wish i was in a serious relationship and engaged or married or whatever shit like that. but then there are moments when my life is so fabulous, like LC in Vegas. And i think to myself "my life would not be this fabulous if i were married and had a house and non Ikea furniture and didn't have roommates." Instead my life might be like Heidi's, no friends eating second rate mexican food with my douchebag fiance. But my life isn't like that. My life does have it's moments of fabulosity. So what i'm saying is, there are pros and cons. clearly this is all subjective and someone else might have watched the show and thought "wow LC's life is lame. Heidi's life is awesome!" But for me heidi's life was my worst nightmare.

oh want to see something funny. This is some guy that came to our house party a few weeks ago and found it racist. What makes me laugh is like...hello we are in michigan. liek how mexican can a party be? if i could have made mole and hired a mariachi band and drank don julio tequila and done el grito at midnight i would have. but instead i had a pinata and mexicans flags and virgen mary candles because that is what i can get in Michigan.

a REAL update, the return of the photo option

so amidst all the parties and fabulousness it's been difficult maintaining this blog in any real way. So we had another little shindig at my place because Big O's girlfriend is moving to paris for a year. yes this is very sad, but sad occasions are also excuses to drink a lot and dance very late into the night to Sean Paul "i'm still in love." this and r. kelly's "Step in the name of love" are my house's official theme songs, and we like to play them when everyone but our key friends (who will eventually pass out on the couch) have left and we are drunkenly slow motion dancing in the living room. good times, indeed. so before making an appearance at my own party I had to make a little cameo and a homosssssexxxxual festivity.

this is me, a gay and a rrrresbian. Or maybe she's bisexual. She also reminds me a lot of janeane garaffalo in reality bites. we were trying to do Tyra's "deconstruction of the human body" pose. failed, me thinks.
this was another drunken attempt at the same pose
I think there isn't enough death in my body langauge. PS look at my new fabulous shoes. patent leather mary janes = awesome! "but why are you wearing glasses, xtina" you may ask. Well my backup plan was to go to this theme party called "the bang" where the theme was back to school. I was going as a sexy teacher and i was gonna have an apple in one hand and a ruler in the other. i ended up not going so as usual i just looked a little oddly dressed. To be honest though this is not very different from how i would normally dress on a weekend.

then i got back to my house and continued to spread the fabulousness around that house
my friend kristen was visiting town which was very exciting to everyone but the frenchman in the background, as you can see.
so i live with the guy in the front, big O, the sour frenchman Bert, who is actually really nice and seriously eats nothing but cheese, bread and pasta. like the stereotypes of european diets is no lie. And i also live with the indian girl, A. yes, we are so multicultural. All we need is a black person.

So at one point the girls got together for a Vagina picture and i had this brilliant idea that since Minayo was moving we should carry her across our arms. in my head this would make for a great picture. this is me coaxing her "come on, just the tip."
the result was a disaster. We dropped her. Fernando was taking pictures of the whole thing and he was cracking up because me and A are standing there cracking up not even trying to help her. Note my fabrrurous legs.

now here is an important topic for discussion. I am on hiatus and i'm never really the kind of person whose friends set them up with people because i think i am just a bit too particular or something. but anyways big O and minayo have this friend Mike and they think that i should date him. this is mike.
No, he's not the guy in the front. He's the goofy white guy in the back. The reason they think i should date him is because he is fun in a weird alternative way. what do you all think? i don't really find him all that attractive but he is a nice person. And jen said she ran into him at the library and he had fallen asleep on his highlighter and had highlighter all over his face and didin't know it. does this sound like my type??? there is a sort of napoleon dynamite quality to him. and he's not latino or a poet or a med student or an engineer so he has the potential to not tell LIES. i guess he does web design or something. i don't know. sounds like potential LIES to me.
oh speaking of computers, i reformatted mine and it keeps asking me to activate the finger print scanner. Trust me if i could have gotten the comp without it i would have but for some reason IBM insisted on this damn finger print scanner. So i ask the blogosphere, why would a normal person like me need a finger print scanner? i'm not sidney bristow. I do'nt have the mock list of spy names stored on my harddrive. what is it's purpose.

Fall is in full effect, falling leaves and all, but we've been having weird weather. bouts of hot and cold and rain and humid and all of it is making a mockery of this rat's nest atop my head. So i would like to thank whoever at garnier fructis finally decided to sell a line for curly hair. I mean their sleek and sheen line is decent but it also leaves build up which is not cute. but their new curly hair line is pretty decent. I've used lots of shampoos expensive and cheap and i gotta say Fructis is pretty good for the low low price of 2.99. coming from a family of beauticians i have have tried my fair share of saloon products in my life. Pureology and redken and frederik fekkai and bliss and shit but in the end i think i just have really good hair because it looks just as good when i use this stuff as when i use Fructis. I have always said that my favorite physical quality about myself is my hair, and i stick by that. Actually what i think it is is my new ionic blow dryer that my aunt got me which reinfuses moisture as it dries. ammaaaazing. And it has rhinestones on it. fancy!

so another week...blah.