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Tuesday, July 31, 2007

apparently no breakthrough, just a breakdown

"your luck will change starting now"

The fortune i received at the chinese restaurant we ate at where Jen claimed i could get "magical chinese healing soup, no msg!" Seriously, jen is chinese so she says things like this all the time about teas and balms and random herbs and foods and it's kind of why i love her. I really thought that this fortune meant my luck would get better since i really seriously think i have terrible terrible luck. But thinking that probably perpetuates the bad luck and so my week of hell continued and i made my best attempt to blaze on.

So there was my first hospital stay which was not very dramatic. Then came 6 more days of a new antibiotic. Then came more wretched back pain, vomiting and fever. Then came my 2nd hospital stay which lasted much longer. Nishi took me and we had a very meta moment as we were sitting in the waiting room after having watched an episode of ER then watching michael moore talk to jay leno about how terrible the american health care system is. I was like...i really don't need to hear this right at this very moment. 5 hours later i was seen by a doctor, given all kinds of tests only to find that my kidney infection had only worstened and they were keeping me over night and the whole next day for 3 treatments of IV antibiotics. The hospital has it's moments of awesome like sleeping and having people take care of you and sassy nurses. but after the 10th hour when your arm starts to get bruised from the needle and you keep having to roll your IV to the bathroom every 10 minutes and you've watched your 4th hour of "a baby story" on tlc and you realize no one is coming to visit you it gets a lot less awesome. It becomes down right depressing. Even more depressing was the meatball stroganoff i was fed. so gross. They discharged me and then jen and fernando picked me up and took me to have this magical soup. i was so tired and worn out. i had literally had every bacteria in my body killed, even the good ones. I got home hoping to just shower, turn on the tivo and just sleep. But of course there happened to be a black out. i took a shower in the dark and sat on the couch naked flashing my yoko ono flashlight crying to myself because seriously it was that sad. Oh and my phone is broken too.

My friends have been really good to me here. Jen and Nishi have let me sleep at their houses in case i need to be rushed to the ER and big O's girlfriend cooked me dinner. So now i'm still on bed rest apparently for the next 2 weeks which totally sucks. being sick and out in the middle of fucking michigan with no family is really depressing so i've decided to screw this bitch and just go home next week and let my parents take care of me for a bit. Besides i think i might be developing a stomach infection. i guess this is pretty common that people who have had this many antibiotics will get a stomach infection. Right now i have really bad cramps and horribly heart burn which is why i'm up blogging instead of sleeping.

Well all this has really made me hope that i never get a real serious illness. They say that people who have good attitudes survive but seriously i can't handle being sick and i'd probably not have a good attitude so i just pray to baby jesus that that never happens to me.

So now i have 1 more day of antibiotics (yay!!! they have been tearing my body apart since i'm on some really strong ones) and i have a friend coming into town on thursday so i am going to try really hard to drink that night. so i am asking the blogosphere, those of you who believe in something or pray to something to please pray that my urine culture comes back negative for infection tomorrow. If it doesn't i'm going to have to go back to the hospital. Pray that i can hold down food. Pray that i GET BETTER!

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