Down coats needed to fight the cold = 1
glasses (and by glasses i mean blue plastic cups) of 2buck chuck = 5
number of times Beyonce was played = 4
number of times i almost fell off of my bike on the way home = 4
number of times i have played Wham "last christmas" since i got home = 6
homosexxxxxxuals = oooh thousands!!
after months of trying to sell myself: "i swear i'm a hag!! my 2 best friends from pre-school are gay!" I have finally made contact with THE GAYS!!
what a night. It started out with me doing 6 hours of hardcore statification. We finished our problem set and i attemped to do some reading but it just wasn't happening because my mind was dead. I went to dinner with some peeps, worked on an outline at the infamous sweetwaters, and then i got a call from JP that he was having a party. Dubbs dubbs!! JP is this trinidadian gay man that i met last week at babs: underground lounge. I sold myself like a whore trying to get a gig with some frat boys. I was like. "i love perez hilton!!! i saw britney's vagina!! is that what a vagina looks like! It's so CAVERNOUSE!! I love cher and justin timberlake!!" things of that nature. I basiclaly was like "hag for sale, BUY ME!!" so by some magical power (and i mean facebook) i got a holler from JP saying he had a party going on tonight and he called me and personally inivited me and i went and it twas truly MAGICAL! intially it just looked like a black party with your occasional white homo thrown in there. Someone put on Mariah "All i want for christmas is you" and all these's gay's started singing along and harmonizing and i was like "wow this is the gayest party I have ever been to" because it really was. Then JP's roommate put on Whitney "i wanna dance with somebody" and the dancefloor cleared and I knew, like seeing the bat-sign "hags and fags to the dancefloor!" It was my call to arms. Like Delacroix's "liberty leading the people", my breast hung out (metaphorically of course) and I DANCED!!! We danced hardcore to some AhHa Take on me...which took me back to how i met my first boyfriend when i said:
"I love this song!!" and he said
"shut up!! this is my RING TONE!!" and i said
"You LIE!!!!!!!!!!!!"
At one point I kept ademately requested the JLo mega mix but THEY DON'T KNOW!! THEY DO'NT KNOW!! Mo's talked about going to Las Vegas and i told them about Olympic gardens and about the dick slap that was felt around the world and we CONNECTED on a gay-latina-straight-woman/gay man LEVEL!!
DUBBS have i told you all (other than cathy) HOW MUCH I LOVE GEORGE MICHAEL!!! seriously i LOVE HIM!!!!!!!!! Wham and post wham, so good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DUBSS DUBSSS I AM HELLLA DRUN KRIGHT KNOW. THIS IS LIKE A LIVE BLOG AND SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ok but for reals, i discovered the gay community tonight and there are like 4 of value. I was yelling "play Wham 'LAST CHRISTMAS!!'" and this Mo came up to me and was like "my favorite Wham song is 'careless whisper'" and at that moment we bonded on a really deep level (cathy, are you feeling me? please comment!)!!!!. I confessed to him that I had received a score of 97 out of 100% on the Magic Mic for my rendition of careless whisper during my family's annual Christmas Eve karaoke competition (we are sooooo multicultural since my cousin married a fffffffffilipppppino!) and he was impressed dispite not knowing what a magic mic was. PEOPLE DON'T KNOW!!
anyways the point is i am HELLA DRUNK and i had good times with GAYS!!!
FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
....
I just called david and said "as NATASHA BEDINGFIELD ONCE SAID 'these words of mine.....i love you, i love you, i love you'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Why does music speak the words of my soul!???? why did i just quote natasha bedingfield?? why is that song so good!?? Why do i LOVE GEORGE MICHAEL!!!!!!????????
Tonight the music seems so LOUD
I wish that we could lose this CROWD
Maybe it's better this way
We'd hurt each other with the things we'd want to say
WE COULD HAVE BEEN SO GOOD TOGETHER
We could have lived this dance forever
but NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO'ONE'S GONNA DANCE WITH ME
Please stay
point being......................................................................
I'M DRUNK!
3 comments:
unrelated, unfortunately, to george michael, although one of the weirdest things that ever happened to me was when rachel and i were in a hostel in edinburgh and the bar in the hostel played george michael EXCLUSIVELY on the jukebox for like an hour and a half...
but, remember when your friends deep fried bacon? http://www.slashfood.com/2006/12/10/an-upcoming-trend-for-next-summers-county-fairs/
shit, link didn't work. try again:
deep fried bacon
i kinda want some of that deep fried bacon...
but back to the topic at hand. how are you drunk like every weekend and i haven't had a drop to drink since the tailgate. save me from monotony (sp?) and the suburbs!
"...somebody tell me..dah dah dah duh dah...why i work so hard for you!!!....and now you're telling me you're havnig my baby..something something something..."
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